High atop the Bonaventure’s central cylinder is an icon of American engineering — the revolving restaurant. It seemed fitting that we begin our culinary adventure in this great rotating chamber, looking down upon our fair city, enjoying a happy hour beverage.

The lounge turns at a slow, yet still nauseating 75 minutes per revolution. I say nauseating because only an inner ring of tables and chairs actually rotates. This creates a dizzying effect as columns and crusty patrons pass you by, against the outside, which is also moving. We all felt uncomfortable the moment we sat down.

The service is painfully slow, not unlike the rotations. It’s not much of a surprise, however. Most everything in the Bonaventure runs on its own time, immune to things like “schedules” or “the outside world.” The Bonaventure is its own world. 

That said, the food is actually pretty tasty. We sampled a shrimp quesadilla and the spinach and artichoke dip. The cracker to dip ratio was poor, but it tasted good enough that we were able to overlook it. 

At 5pm, everything on the happy hour menu is $5. A 6pm it goes up to $6. At 7pm, you guessed it, $7. At 8 everyone still inside is killed.

What might be the most amazing thing about the Bona Vista Lounge is the premium drink options. These come displayed on a shitty card shaped the hotel itself. The options are staggering. 

There’s a margarita shaped like California, a daiquiri in a boot, a banana “thing”, and best of all…

The Cloud Buster. $18 dollars worth of sugar and low-shelf liquor. You really can’t go wrong. The goblet is truly the cup of a king, and will serve as a trophy to signify the best, and worst, of Bon-Adventure. 

Cheerio, good chaps. Cheerio.

Bona Vista Revolving Cocktail Lounge

Food: ****

Service: **

Value: ***

Bizarre Factor: ***